So Send I You

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So send I you to labor unrewarded,

To serve unpaid, unloved, unsought, unknown,

To bear rebuke, to suffer scorn and scoffing –

So send I you to toil for Me alone.

 

So send I you to bind the bruised and broken,

O’er wand’ring souls to work, to weep, to wake,

To bear the burdens of a world aweary –

So send I you to suffer for My sake.

 

So send I you to loneliness and longing,

With heart ahung’ring for the loved and known,

Forsaking home and kindred, friend and dear one –

So send I you to know My love alone.

 

So send I you to leave your life’s ambition,

To die to dear desire, self-will resign,

To labor long, and love where men revile you –

So send I you to love your life in Mine.

 

So send I you to hearts made hard by hatred,

To eyes made blind because they will not see,

To spend, tho’ it be blood, to spend and spare not –

So send I you to taste of Calvary.

 

-Margaret Clarkson

 

 

 

 

 
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The Vision is Jesus

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This is the vision that God gave a guy named Peter Grieg for 24/7 prayer and it moves my heart every time I read it or listen to it. This is our generation. We are that army.

*You can listen to this vision in this song at 6.44

 

The Vision – by Pete Greig
So this guy comes up to me and says:
“what’s the vision? What’s the big idea?”
I open my mouth and words come out like this:
The vision?

The vision is JESUS – obsessively, dangerously, undeniably Jesus.

The vision is an army of young people.
You see bones? I see an army.
And they are FREE from materialism.

They laugh at 9-5 little prisons.
They could eat caviar on Monday and crusts on Tuesday.
They wouldn’t even notice.
They know the meaning of the Matrix, the way the west was won.

They are mobile like the wind, they belong to the nations.
They need no passport.
People write their addresses in pencil and wonder at their strange existence.
They are free yet they are slaves of the hurting and dirty and dying.

What is the vision ?

The vision is holiness that hurts the eyes.
It makes children laugh and adults angry.
It gave up the game of minimum integrity long ago to reach for the stars.
It scorns the good and strains for the best.
It is dangerously pure.

Light flickers from every secret motive, every private conversation.
It loves people away from their suicide leaps, their Satan games.
This is an army that will lay down its life for the cause.
A million times a day its soldiers choose to loose,
that they might one day win
the great ‘Well done’ of faithful sons and daughters.

Such heroes are as radical on Monday morning as Sunday night. They don’t need fame from names. Instead they grin quietly upwards and hear the crowds chanting again and again: “COME ON!”

And this is the sound of the underground
The whisper of history in the making
Foundations shaking
Revolutionaries dreaming once again
Mystery is scheming in whispers
Conspiracy is breathing…
This is the sound of the underground

And the army is discipl(in)ed.
Young people who beat their bodies into submission.
Every soldier would take a bullet for his comrade at arms.
The tattoo on their back boasts “for me to live is Christ and to die is gain”.

Sacrifice fuels the fire of victory in their upward eyes.
Winners. Martyrs.
Who can stop them ?
Can hormones hold them back?
Can failure succeed?
Can fear scare them or death kill them ?

And the generation prays

like a dying man
with groans beyond talking,
with warrior cries, sulphuric tears and
with great barrow loads of laughter!
Waiting. Watching: 24 – 7 – 365.

Whatever it takes they will give: Breaking the rules. Shaking mediocrity from its cosy little hide. Laying down their rights and their precious little wrongs, laughing at labels, fasting essentials. The advertisers cannot mould them. Hollywood cannot hold them. Peer-pressure is powerless to shake their resolve at late night parties before the cockerel cries.

They are incredibly cool, dangerously attractive

Inside.

On the outside? They hardly care.
They wear clothes like costumes to communicate and celebrate but never to hide.
Would they surrender their image or their popularity?
They would lay down their very lives – swap seats with the man on death row – guilty as hell. A throne for an electric chair.

With blood and sweat and many tears, with sleepless nights and fruitless days,
they pray as if it all depends on God and live as if it all depends on them.

Their DNA chooses JESUS. (He breathes out, they breathe in.)
Their subconscious sings. They had a blood transfusion with Jesus.
Their words make demons scream in shopping centres.

Don’t you hear them coming?

Herald the weirdo’s! Summon the losers and the freaks.
Here come the frightened and forgotten with fire in their eyes.
They walk tall and trees applaud, skyscrapers bow, mountains are dwarfed by these children of another dimension.
Their prayers summon the hounds of heaven and invoke the ancient dream of Eden.

And this vision will be.
It will come to pass;
it will come easily;
it will come soon.

How do I know?

Because this is the longing of creation itself,
the groaning of the Spirit,
the very dream of God.

My tomorrow is his today.
My distant hope is his 3D.
And my feeble, whispered, faithless prayer invokes a thunderous, resounding, bone-shaking great ‘Amen!’ from countless angels, from hero’s of the faith, from Christ himself. And he is the original dreamer, the ultimate winner.

Guaranteed.

Abba

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Abba has been the cry within my heart and the reality resonating within my soul….

 

“You’re more real than the ground I’m standing on

You’re more real than the wind in my lungs

 Your thoughts define me, You’re inside of me

 You’re my reality

 You’re closer than the skin on my bones

You’re closer than the song on my tongue”

 

 

 

When it comes to Love

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“When it comes to love, I love forever.

When it comes to you, I am committed.

When it comes to trust, you can lean on me.

When it comes to peace, I can calm any storm.

When it comes to joy, My presence is enough.

When it comes to strength I am your strong tower.

When it comes to hope, My love, you can hope in Me.

When it comes to comfort, take refuge under the shadow of My wings. 

When it comes to life, I am all you need

When it comes to loving you, I will love you forever 

Forever into Eternity.”

 

Missions not as Usual

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“And they overcame by the blood of The Lamb, by the word of their testimony and they did not love their lives not even until death.” Rev 12:11

Something The Lord has been working on my heart and have been speaking to me about is “doing missions not as usual”, doing business not as usual. Most of us missionaries including myself go on short term mission trips and some even long term, with the hope of coming home alive. But what if we go and not come back? 

I remember going to East Asia and Thailand with that mindset. Although it was risky at times, I knew I was coming back. I expected to come back. 

 I am not condemning that but what we really need is a missions movement filled with fearless lovers, who will go on missions with the reality that they might not come back, to be prepared to lay down their lives, for they know there is a great reward for them if they would endure till the end. There is a crown of life that awaits them.

I don’t want to be a part of a “self preservation” missions movement nor do I want to call my generation to that. 

But what is the motivation? How can one be so moved or motivated by something that would drive them to even death.

 Passion is the driving force. It’s the very thing that motivated Jesus as He endured the cross, bearing the sins of humanity. Passion for us drove Him to the cross and it sustained Him while He was mocked, rejected, stripped, whipped, and crucified.

 Well Amy, aren’t you scared? Aren’t you afraid of persecution, pain and death? What about families and loved ones? Of course I am afraid and of course my heart breaks at the thought of leaving families and loved ones. My flesh is begging to stay where it is safe, where it is comfortable, where there is certainty, where there is no risk needed. But He is worth everything that I am and everything that I have. 

I mean isn’t that what Christianity is about? Radical lovers willing to lay down their lives for a cause. The cause of Christ. Isn’t He worth it? Isn’t He worth everything that we own? Everything that we are? When we look to His cross, does it not demand all of us, even our very lives? We are just a vapor, here today and gone tomorrow. We only have one life, why shouldn’t we waste it on Him, who gave it all for us. It’s easier said then done of course. But it all starts with a yes and then another yes to the things of God. It requires a no and then another no to the things of the world and the things of our flesh. 

 Nevertheless, the weak yes in my heart triumphs over the endless questions in my mind. My love for Him overcome fears and doubts. 

Oh but there is a comforting promise that He is with us: “I will be with You even till the end and happy is he who is persecuted for righteousness sake.” 

 I want to follow Him where ever He leads me. He is My Sheperd and I trust His perfect leadership. 

 He is worthy of it all. He truly is worth it all. 

From Thailand to 2nd Track

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My time in Thailand was life changing. My life will never ever be the same again and my heart has been knitted to this nation. I saw well over 1500 people impacted by the Good News and love of Jesus. I saw women in the Red Light District awakened to the reality that there is a God who loves them and to know that they are precious and valuable in His sight. That He hears their cry for justice.. I saw 16 young Hmong children in a village experience The Holy Spirit as He revealed Jesus to them and seeing them inviting Him into their hearts. I saw young teenage girls live’s being transformed as they encounter God in the place of prayer in our prayer meetings, now they’re the ones leading the meetings. I saw Buddhist monks who were seeking for more, walk away with answers and setting on a new journey of discovering truth, discovering Jesus. Those were just snippets of what I experienced. The faces, the stories, the lives I got to touch and the places I got to visit are snapshots forever kept in my heart. 

So while in Thailand, God began to speak to me about my plans after Thailand and He placed a desire in my heart to come back to Kansas City for the 2nd track. This was not my original plan at all,  but one thing I’ve learned this past year is that His ways are truly higher than my ways. And there’s no other way way I would rather live but to live according to God’s will.

All to say, I am currently back in Kansas City for the 2nd track of ACTS. After 3 months of in depth biblical studies pertaining to missions, language learning and college outreaches to international students, my team of 8 and I will make our way to the Middle East for 10 weeks.

Would you prayerfully consider sending me to the Middle East whether it is through prayer, finances and or both. Would you consider joining with me in whatever capacity the Lord leads and, together, we can have an impact among the unreached peoples. The total amount needed for the next 6 months is $9000. This amount will cover all housing, tuition, food, airfare to/from outreach, resources, vaccinations, visas and extra expenses